I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought; and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder. 

― G.K. Chesterton

We are coming down the home stretch in this challenge. In the last chapter, we covered an often underrated strength that can bring a laugh or smile to almost any situation: humour. 

In this chapter, we are going to talk about two other underrated strengths that can increase the value of almost anything in our lives – appreciation or what the VIA classification calls the Appreciation of Beauty and Excellence, and, simply put, Gratitude. While thinking about that best possible life that we are creating a path toward in the future, it is good to be able to know about and exercise these two strengths that can make every day of our lives precious. 

We will begin with the Appreciation of Beauty and Excellence (or just “appreciation” as I often refer to it). To begin with, it may help to know that there are at least three main focuses for it. 

The first focus is physical beauty, which we may most often see with our eyes. For me, it is the way the the sun sets here in Namibia, which for good reason is called the “Land of vast open spaces”. There may be only one Mona Lisa, but almost every day, especially around sunrise and sunset, with the clouds that glide and dance in an ever-changing pattern that even Leonardo Da Vinci couldn’t completely capture. Physical beauty is something we may most associate with our richly endowed visual sense but it can be also be accessed through our other senses, as in the sound of music, that song we never tire of; the smells we love that help us feel peaceful and grounded; the taste of a gourmet meal; or the kind and compassionate touch of a loved one when we are having a rough day. 

The second focus for appreciation is the excellence we see in exceptional displays of human skill or talent. The way that Maradonna played soccer transcended the sport and got people who never watched the game to tune in just to watch him. This kind of excellence can be one of the rewards for doing what you love, using your strengths, and having the experience of mastering something after months and years of practice. Yes, you appreciate the excellence of a Maradonna, who may have done one thing better than anyone else. But you can also appreciate excellence in overcoming obstacles that you saw in the boy with autism who sunk six three pointers in a row, or in Nick Vujicic, who with no arms and legs shows us how he has learned to do many things that we take for granted. 

But it is the third focus of appreciation that may provide the best hope for humanity, especially when we view it in light of what we are learning about the biology of kindness and compassion. The third focus is acts of virtue, moral beauty, and goodness. When you witness the loving way that Mother Teresa embraced that dying person on the streets of Calcutta, the mirror neurons firing in our brains let us know what it may feel like to be a part of that embrace, the oxytocin released in our bodies makes us feel connected with everyone around us, and the warm feeling of elevation that wells up in our chest motivates us to live and act with similar kindness and compassion. 

Thus, there are at least three different ways that we can focus our Appreciation of Beauty and Excellence – on physical beauty, on human excellence in others and ourselves, and on acts of love, kindness, and compassion that can awaken and bring the better angels within us to life. 

This is the power of appreciation. You drive a new car off the lot and it quickly depreciates by thousands of dollars that you will never get back. Then you see or just think about something beautiful or the love that someone expressed to you and that depreciating car, downturn in the stock market, or even that cancer diagnosis you recently got no longer bother you quite so much. 

Moreover, gratitude may just be a different facet of appreciation where both stem from the same wondrous capacity we have to see, savour, and be moved by the things around us. The word gratitude is derived from the same root word as “grace” – as in that which can be amazing – and which refers to something that is a free gift. 

Gratitude is a natural response to receiving a gift and it motivates us to give back in some way. There are times when there is a person that we can thank for a gift we receive, like you did when you write a gratitude letter. But there are other times when we can’t attribute what we are grateful for to another human being. Maybe that’s why some of us can’t help but think that there might be something sacred and divine behind it all. 

But even if we can’t always identify the source of what we are grateful for, we can use our motivation to give back to increase courage and grit we need to do some of the hard things we sometimes have to do. Gratitude can enable us to extend our empathy and compassion to those who are more difficult to love – or help us face our fears and overcome the obstacles that get in the way of our goals and dreams. 

While I gave you ways to increase your Appreciation of Beauty and Excellence by knowing where to look, I want to leave you with some of the specific ways we have found that may help us the most in fostering gratitude. 

First, research has shown that there are benefits in simply stopping to count our blessings and that, for most people, it doesn’t have to be every day. We may want to start by creating a working list of all the different things we are grateful for; but returning once a week to review, remind ourselves, and add to the list may go a long way.

Second, the thing we that asked you to do during the first part of this challenge – to look for three good things every day – may be good to do more often. We can use it whenever we sense that negativity bias beginning to creep back into our awareness and make it harder to see and appreciate the little things that can bring us so much joy. 

Third, there is the expression of gratitude that was a part of the gratitude letter you wrote and all of the other ways that we can intentionally say the words that can mean so much to other people. You can continue this in so many ways and use the new vocabulary of the VIA strengths you have learned and strength spotting to better see what you can express to others in gratitude. 

There are countless other small and simple ways we can remind ourselves of the goodness, beauty, kindness, and love that can help get us out of bed on our darkest of days. You can start a gratitude journal that you review when you feel the storm clouds rolling in. You can write the blessings you have counted or good things you have noticed on Post-Its or enter them as reminders on one of the many smart phone apps that now make this possible. You can make it a part of your routine to send an email or give a note of appreciation to someone at the beginning or end of every week or every day. 

Gratitude is like the kindness that we talked about in relation to the movie Amelie. It is one of the most powerful ways to change our lives and bring our happiness to a new level – and once we begin to see its power and experience its benefits – we won’t want to stop practicing it. 

Workbook Tasks for the Chapter 

Here are the tasks that will continue to help you plan for a better future, deal with stress and obstacles along the way, and foster appreciation and gratitude: 

First, there is a special video to watch from the movie the Shawshank Redemption that shows how it is possible to appreciate beauty in almost any circumstance and that doing so can make all the difference. 

Second, the most important task for this chapter is to complete the final two steps of the PATH process using the guidelines in the Appendix . This includes step 7, Organizing the Month’s Work, by being specific about how you’ll make progress in the next month, and step 8, Committing to the First Step, which involves doing something now to get started. 

Third, this task involves giving yourself a kind of psychological vaccination with something called Stress Inoculation Training developed by psychologist Donald Meichenbaum. Here, it will include making a list of the obstacles you may face in the next month and writing about how you think you might best deal with them. 

Fourth, there are reflection questions about how to make appreciation and gratitude more a part of your life and about taking the first step you set for yourself in the PATH process.